A divorce is hard to deal with emotionally, not forgetting how much it costs to go through one. You need a good attorney like Drendel & Jansons, you need to think of your kids, you start thinking of how to start a new life all again, etc. in short, it is a process. It is not going to be easy and there are a few things you need to know when going through one.
Therapy is necessary
It is likely that you are going to feel lonely when going through your divorce. This may not be good for your health. That is why most people are advised to seek therapy when going through their divorce. You need someone to talk to and someone to give you the advice you need to move on. And what’s more, a therapist doesn’t know your ex-spouse, you, or even the specific events that led to your divorce so you will be more comfortable sharing as you will feel less-judged.
Divorce is different for every person
Divorce experiences are not a one size fits all kind of thing. Many people, while going through a divorce, tend to take advice from their friends who have also gone down the same road. What your friend experienced during their divorce is not similar to what you are going through. You should know that your experience is different so let the experts deal with each issue of your divorce.
Acknowledge it wasn’t a failure
One emotion that many divorcees go through is the feeling of being a failure. You want to acknowledge that you did not fail and that for your marriage to work, you and your spouse were equally responsible. Don’t make the mistake of taking all the blame because it will only weigh you down, while you are already going through a rough patch of your life. Acknowledge that it wasn’t a failure and make peace with yourself about it.
Grieving is normal
It is okay to allow yourself to grieve. You had been with your partner for a couple of years, if not decades, and it is someone who you shared a life with. For any normal person, letting go of someone you loved is going to take a toll on you, so take your time and grieve for your loss, it is normal.
Find your happy place
Chances are that you gave up a lot of things you love doing to try and make your marriage work. The good news is that you can go back to freely doing those things now that you are getting a divorce. Marriages mean a lot of sacrifices and trying to find a central place to ‘meet’ with your partner, in order to strike a balance between your differences. So, now you have nothing to compromise and you can go find your happy place.
Take your time
You need to understand that immediately jumping into a new relationship may do more harm than good to you. You don’t want to make the mistake of getting into a relationship with someone for the sake of getting over your divorce. Take your time to heal and get your emotions back on track before you start to date.0