If you’ve been reading me for a while, it will come as no surprise to you that I am a highly trained cardboard box killing machine. I’ve made no secret of the fact that I will take out any box that crosses my path for no apparent reason, other than the sheer joy of destroying the box. Oh, and it helps mom fit them into the recycle bin and you’d know I’m all about saving the environment.
But what you may not be aware of is that I am now training new recruits in this mission to destroy all the cardboard boxes in the world. That’s right. Mackenzie has now entered Box Domination Boot Camp and it will be a very rigorous schedule.
Unfortunately, her attention span is a bit short. So while I was explaining the art of tearing up boxes with your teeth, Mackenzie got a bit distracted by her rake. Maybe she was just envisioning how she would soon be using it to clean up the dead box wasteland we were about to leave behind.
So I decided it was time to give her some hand-to-hand combat training where she could really get her hands dirty.
She was showing that box who the boss was although we have to work on her tearing skills. She didn’t try to rip the box with her teeth even once. I must have been explaining that when she started daydreaming about the rake…
I looked on with anticipation and hope, waiting for her to really finish the box off and rip it to shreds. Or at least rip a tiny piece off. I mean we were here to kill, not just examine.
But eventually, she must have hit a Newfie drool pocket and decided this whole box destruction scheme might not be all that spectacular. She admitted defeat to the box and backed away so I could finish the job.
And finish it I did. I ripped and I tore. I scratched and I flung. And I think that in the midst of the cardboard chaos, I actually saw Mackenzie take a few notes as well. I have high hopes for our next training session.
Hopefully next time, the photo you will see will be of Mackenzie towered over the decimated cardboard box. Not just me.
Find yourself a cardboard box today and do your part to help recycle. Destroy that box and leave it looking like confetti.